P in the Park 2005 (Talisman MCC)

This will be a split report this year, as I can only make it to this rally on the Saturday night, so the Friday night report will be based on the (hazy) recollections of The Rev, and Big Bri....
(I am writing this on the friday so that at least we will have the first report up - eh Al!)

The Rev's report:

8.00 Friday morning– text from Matty, “I think we are leaving early and going down with snake n moira coz snake can’t navigate for toffee.” Me lying in bed thinking “bugger – bugger – bugger, need to pack tent still and get new tyres”..

9.00 Friday morning – another text saying they were leaving at 10.30,… aaagh no chance of me making it and I ain’t got a Scooby where to go…..

9.10 Friday morning – relax…. Matty tells me that Big Bri is still going at 2 so I have plenty of time, phew, better get tent packed then…

9.15 Friday Morning – sudden thought, Turra is gonna be meeting us all at rendezvous point at 2pm, better let her know what’s happening, quick phone call and Turra is taking car down due to broken forks on her bike, time to get some new tyres myself.

Got new tyres fitted from Sillets, gets to Tesco to grab some stuff for the rally and the traffic is a nightmare, even with my “I can make that gap” mentality, it takes a long time to get there, phones Bri “Gonna be late mate” – “No bother, so am I, meet at Stony instead?” – “OK, see ya at 3”

3.30 Friday Afternoon – Sitting waiting for Bri, thinking “Hope the Rally Gremlin ain’t got him again”, Bri arrives, fuels up and tells me the fun he had scrubbing in a new tyre through diesel, after a quick “You wanna go that way, then that way”, I lead the way out to the first refuel stop, “I’ll be taking it easy” I said to Bri before we left, well, I didn’t get over 100 so I was taking it easy-ish.

Refuel at Dundee, head off towards Sterling and ended up in a Little Chef absolutely soaked through… picture the scene

“Bikers ride into Little Chef with fully loaded bikes, 2 BIG bikers….. Wander in and ask for a smoking table, strip off wet outer clothing, sit down looking mean, and ask for “Toasted teacake and a coffee please”….. Serving lasses face was a picture….

On the road again, feeling a bit warmer but a bit squishier, putting on a wet jacket ain’t nice, and waterlogged boots make your feet feel heavy.

Gets down the road a bit further, Bri taking the lead now as I ain’t got a clue where to go, we takes a wrong turn on the motorway, pulls over and Bri hands me the map and directions out of his top box… hmmmmm, notice something here?

I tried to get us back on the right road, but ended up in a cinema complex asking for directions and a garage (low on fuel now), Bri told me there was fuel available at the truck stop, so off we go again. Even with new directions, I missed the bloody turn and Bri took up the lead, eventually we get to the truck stop.

Guess what, no fuel, me coasting in on fumes as well, “There used to be pumps” was all Bri said with a big grin on his face, ah well, I can always get a lift to the garage if need be.

Vicky and her mate Claire were at the gate when we turned up, bumped into Al from Bikers1 and after a quick chat, we decided to ride up to the tents with our gear.

Arriving at the F3 tent site, noticed that Turra’s tent was perched up on the hill, so assisted her in re-locating it amongst our tents. Setting up the tent was assisted with the help from Sir Jack and Sir Morgan along with a few beers.

From this point onwards it got a bit silly, my memory of events gets a bit blurry, might have something to do with “Turbo Vimto” after nearly half a bottle of Morgan’s n Coke, suffice to say I vaguely remember some bands making music, think they were “Full Metal Racket” and another one which played some seriously addictive tunes (but I was a bit gone by then so can’t remember what they were called – I’ve since been told they were “The Claches”)

I do remember the “Wee John Pinball” that we partook of and poor wee john remembers it as well (hope you recovered ok mate), also the stripping event (photo’s have been hidden of that one, to save the delicate eyes of some readers) where my t-shirt ended up on Claire and her strappy top ended up on me, yes, you can stop laughing now, it wasn’t that funny.

I do remember walking back to my tent t-shirtless and falling through the door, next thing I remember is that overwhelming urge you get when waking up from a drunken stupor, yup it’s a full fried breakfast.

The eating facilities at the rally were fantastic, had some wonderful meals, and ate better there than I do at home. Wandered over to watch the Wheelie Bin Races and they were a laugh, forgot to take photo’s though as was too busy watching people trying to negotiate a straight run (you had to be there to know what I mean), but some people couldn’t push the bins uphill in a straight line, there were some spectacular crashes.

Saturday evening turned up rather fast and I decided to not get too drunk this time, although I did have a few drinks to celebrate my birthday, well ya got to ain’t ya.

First band was a bunch of young lads called “Bloodstone” playing a wide selection of metal music, turns out they were pretty good for the first gig and one of them was the son of Al (from bikers1.com)

We had a tattoo competition next so I thought “what the hell, I’ve already been seen by everyone half naked” so entered it. Snake and Big Bri entered as well, so we had 3 F3 Rally members in the line-up. After having 2 women check us out (which they seemed to enjoy, especially Scooby) Bri won with his leg tattoo, not surprising really as it was done by Kev from Draconian Tattoo’s who also done mine.

Lasses competition next and only 2 entered, didn’t get to see what the tatt’s were as too many blokes were crowding around them.
Also had the trophy awards after the comps then came “Apparition”. they had the place jumping, found out they were a replacement as the original band pulled out just that morning, and they knew their stuff, the floor was heaving from the moment they struck up, someone’s underwear even ended up on the mike, was bloody good fun.

All good things must come to an end and so did Saturday night, crawled into my bed at ???oclock in the morning.

Sunday arrived with a roar, the roar of bikes leaving the campsite.
Struggled to get up, managed to pack my bags, then crawled out the tent to say hi to everyone who was within earshot, after a bit of friendly banter over snoring etc., watching Mitch emerging from his tent like a butterfly emerging from it’s cocoon (well, not exactly a butterfly, but you get my drift), I ended up going for my breakfast. Saying goodbye to people who I vaguely recognised I wandered back to the campsite to see Bob, Snake and Bri sitting on their bikes waiting for me at the exit… panic, tent not even packed, get a move on…

After a bit of a struggle, the tent fitted the bag and I got the stuff bungied on, driving off the site I waved to others doing the same leaving Matty and Ang still packing stuff up. Went for petrol to the local garage and came back to see if Matty and Ang were ready, also realised I’d misplaced some of my bungie cords and now knew why the tent etc. was wobbling on my bike. Matty came to the rescue with a few spare cords, but wasn’t ready by the time we wanted to leave so instead of us sitting there sweating, Bri, Snake and myself set off leaving Bob waiting for them.

A but uneventful of a return trip, Matty, Ang and Bob caught up with us at the Little Thief in Dundee so we all trundled into Aberdeen in a little bike train.

Overall a damn good weekend and can’t wait for the next one.

Fat Boab's Report: Given all that has happened, and my shit memory... for this rally only, please visit Big Bri's Rally report here!

My photo's are here!